Queer women partners of female -to -male transsexuals: Renegotiating self in relationship

This research was a qualitative examination of the experiential accounts of sexual-minority women whose female-bodied partners 'came out' as transsexual men and underwent transition female-to-male (FTM). Little research has been done in this area and the purpose of the study was to investigate how FTM transition influences a queer woman partner's conceptualization of her sexual identity; the interpersonal negotiation of the partners' respective sexual and/or gender identities; and community adjustments resultant of transition. The researcher interviewed twenty queer-identified women in Canada and the United States who had experienced or were experiencing the transition of an FTM partner. Based on a grounded theory analysis, a trajectory model of dyadic adjustment is proposed, including key tasks. Other findings indicated participants managed the renegotiation of their sexuality through continued participation in queer life as well as theoretical reconciliation. Adjustment was affected by women's flexibility and investment in their sexual orientation, and ability to be socially recognized, which could result in identity sublimation, transition, or consolidation, understood through tenets of social identity theory. Additionally, many partners experienced caregiver burden, which emerged as another substantive category understood through social exchange theory principles. Perceptions of burden were related to the availability and quality of psychosocial resources, the intensity and chronicity of care demands, and the ability of queer women to set limits in the context of structural transphobia and their socialization as women to be caregivers. Those who attempted to over-compensate frequently experienced emotional deprivation and depletion and/or compromised functioning, while those who engaged in self-care practices and who had a reciprocal relationship fared better. For some, fatigue was not simply a consequence of unintentionally overextending themselves, but part of an abusive pattern by their FTM partner, reported by a minority of participants. Retrospective risk factors included the context of a 'first relationship' with a transman, and not knowing other transmen; context against which to make judgments about normative behaviour. Numerous women reported their partner mobilizing identity politics as a tactic to normalize and minimize the abuse. Implications of the research findings at the community and societal level, as well as applications to counseling are discussed.